Like Magic

peeta_fan_forever Thursday, 8 May 2014
love it
Harry Dodgson Sunday, 12 August 2012
Well written but there are punctuation errors.
angelizme Tuesday, 7 August 2012
HURY UP!!! I read this book way before u took it down and honestly coodnt sleep, it was that good! I kept fatassizing and dreaming about Nate and all the cool things that happen....please hurry and update!
Abby Vandiver Sunday, 15 July 2012
I'm looking foward to reading more of your work. So, hurry up and post!
J.P. Ergott Wednesday, 18 November 2015
Man, I love this. You're a much better author than me! Can you read my story? Bess and the Order of Midnight Magik by J.P. Ergott. I'd love to get your opinion!
YoungAuthors Wednesday, 5 February 2014
This book is GREAT. Read and Rate mine? (I'd appreciate the feedback) The Falling Gifts The Seventh Star :) Thanks and Good luck to you!
Tahani Friday, 18 January 2013
Oh and I forgot to say that I love the way you connected the story to the chapter title. Very clever ;)
Tahani Friday, 18 January 2013
I like it a lot. It's very well written. I can picture her sister clearly. However, I feel as if something's missing with his intro as well. This could possibly lend a lift to the next chapter though so I'm just going to wait and see what happens. Love it :)
C.A.M Friday, 11 January 2013
Good job! I noticed some problems, but over all it was interesting.
Now here are the problems I noticed:
1) You added sufficient detail, but it was detail that we don't particularly need to know. Try adding more detail to important things, things that help us create a scene in our minds. See, feel, hear, smell, etc. These are all important details. For example, 'my hand is warm where the plate previously rested.' Don't really need that, unless you expand on it, and add more details around that. Otherwise, it just looks out of place.
2) Try to space out the description of her sister. It was too soon to describe a character, and you should never just start describing someone in you MC's mind. Space it out. Example. ' "Blah blah Blah." She said, moving to her dresser and bending down, her bony knees stretching against her yoga pants. She tried to hide it, but it was getting worse. I could tell. I diverted my eyes as she struggled to her feet, using the dresser to support her.'
You get the idea? Create an image. Show, don't tell. I can't tell you how important that is! :)
3) I think that Nate could have used a better introduction. He is going to be a big character, yet I didn't care at all about him. He needs more intrigue, something that puts a bigger imprint on readers. Girls will read your book, mainly because they have fallen in love with your main guy! So I would work on that.
Anyways, I hope I helped :)
FlamingSnowflake Friday, 11 January 2013
Where are from? Your writing makes me think we are from just about the same area. I'm from south so.. I feel bad for Lia, she needs to learn to eat or something.
FlamingSnowflake Friday, 11 January 2013
I really like it so far :) (only on 3rd paragraph) from the name of the 1st chapter I knew this would be the type of I book i would like. btw I love the metaphor in the description.
jessie anita Wednesday, 15 August 2012
really love the start of this. It really allows you in on the situation. You also feel the bond between the sisters. It makes you want to carry on reading. really great! :)
Harry Dodgson Sunday, 12 August 2012
In many ways this is well written, even with the punctuation errors. Whilst I consider there are several grammar errors I am loth to comment on them because whilst I see them as errors being English I think and write in British English. For example, the word gotten. I never can understand why this word is used.
I also note a single use of profane language, whilst I acknowledge it is in common use I ask , should you use it unless you are writing erotica.
I won't comment on the plot as this is a subject on which I am totally ignorant, even though I did bring up three daughters.
If you wish, I will re-write this chapter correcting what I feel are errors of grammar.
Finally, for your age you write well. Writers are often told to write what they know and at your age you haven't yet had a lot of experience of life.
However time will take care of that.
Let me know if you want me to re-write it.

Tahani Friday, 18 January 2013
I think you were right about me liking your book xD I feel that Claire is a bit of a push-over ^.^ but i like her still. She's he own person.
Forever Incomplete Monday, 11 September 2017
Would an amazing author like yourself please critique my humble works?
Mi Wang Monday, 16 December 2013
personally, i'd be a little suspicious of nate because of the way he's so interested in claire. but he seems like a person with a good heart and good intentions, so...
BittersweetIrony Sunday, 13 January 2013
I'm really enjoying this and I'm liking Nate so far continue!
Sahara Edwards Thursday, 10 January 2013
DUDE!! I love Nate already!!! But I can totally help you out with some of the very minor things like a few awkwardly worded phrases and a few missing words in only a couple places.
K. LiCausi Monday, 13 August 2012
I like this! It's intriguing and I'm curious as to where it will go. Admittedly, I kind of love Nate and the Nate I'm picturing is super cute. {You had me at curly brown hair.} I'm kind of anal about spelling, so forgive me; "isle" in the first chapter should be "aisle" and "ancy" in I-can't-remember-which chapter should be "antsy." But other than that, nothing I've noticed! I can't wait to read more!
C.W Gibbon Sunday, 12 August 2012
LOVE IT! Keep writing!
Nverna74 Saturday, 5 March 2011
Great! There are a few spots with run-ons, but other than that, it's awesome. I would totally appreciate if you read and rated mine. I post a new chapter every day.
Shazza Sunday, 9 January 2011
Awesome!! Love this!!!
Mary-Annalee DiGiovanni Wednesday, 29 December 2010
The plot is good, and the topic a great one to draw awareness to. right now i would suggest that you read your story aloud and check for grammar errors and ways you could improve the flow of your sentences. also, a little more description might help your chapter.
Gracey Austen-Poe Thursday, 9 December 2010
this is really good :) poor Lia!
%Trina% <3 Friday, 22 October 2010
Wow!I really enjoyed every minute of your writing. You really know how to utilize your characters personalites and make them work for the story. Well of course you do, their your characters! Your writing is so fluid and easy to read. No akward sentences, and really appealing to pathos in alot of your writing. Haha the one thing I had to read over a few times was when you said Lia bought seventeen books. I just thought that was a little extreme. I mean it doesnt make sense, all she does is run on the treadmill and sleep. Maybe just cut down the number of books a little bit. I also hope your not bailing on your audience. I love it, we love, so keep writing!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!
KiannaDowds Monday, 16 August 2010
I love this!
It's so raw, if you know what I mean. It's real, and I love that.

Comment/Rate mine if you can? ;)

Angelena Fox-Francisco Friday, 13 August 2010
Oh my gosh I love this! The only problem I have is WHY the heck isn't Claire saying anything? yeah, yeah, yeah, that's usually what happens in books. I get it. Haha I like Nate though
UndeadBeauty Thursday, 12 August 2010
this is awesome! i love the detail! *added to faves* can u read mine?
SarahKate Tuesday, 10 August 2010
Hmmm, seems interesting enough! I'll keep reading later.
How long does it normally take you to post a chapter?
Shreya S. Monday, 2 August 2010
This is great! I will def keep reading!
*added to favorites!*
sweetpea Sunday, 1 August 2010
i loved everysecond of this!
mind reading mine? thanks.

keep writing.
nita92 Wednesday, 14 July 2010
I love it...I like Nate...mind reading mine?
Nicole :D Thursday, 8 July 2010
Great! Mind reading mine?!
Elle Whittaker Monday, 5 July 2010
I love it so far!
Sorry it took me so long to review this!
I love the name Nathan/Nate ♥
I always end up using that name for my main characters haha!
Keep up the good work!
Anna Nguyen Sunday, 20 June 2010
I loved it(: Keep writing. It's going to be awesome(: i can just tell.
Capitalletters Thursday, 17 June 2010
Can't wait to read some more of this. I love the dialog too. Well Done.
Caleb J Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Also change "is" to "I" in this sentence (which is already edited for you): "...Lia knows where to find me, because this is where I sit every time we come."
Caleb J Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Not bad, just make sure you add a comma after you use a conjunction (and, so, but, etc.).

Also, make sure you hyphenate the words, "self-conscious" and three-hundred dollars". Also, Civil War should be capitalized. It is not Ipod, but iPod. Collarbone is one word.

Watch out for surplus words. In the paragraph about your mother reading the paper, the narrator already established that the mother was speaking, but you reiterated that she was speaking; don't.

I also do not see why this story is written in present tense. It will sound just find (and better) in past tense. The story sounds very awkward, in my opinion, in present tense.

Other than that, not bad. Also, thanks for checking out my work, although "The Missing Family" is my worst, unedited story ever, lol. I would love to hear your opinion about my up-to-date work, like Creeping Death.
C.J. Sinclair Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Very well done, clean prose and to the point. Top effort!
SW Tuesday, 15 June 2010
First off, I'd like to thank you for checking out Strange(: Second off, I'd like to tell you that your book cover is pretty freaking cool. And Thirdly, I'd like to let you know that this book is freakin' kickass(: I like it. Good work(:
Noella Elaine Reid Tuesday, 15 June 2010
Thankyou so much for commenting on my book! Like Magic so far is beautifully written and I cant wait to read more. 5/5
owen carless Tuesday, 15 June 2010
wow, you write A LOT. good stuff.
becc Tuesday, 15 June 2010
I love it. I also love what Nate writes his number on. That cracked me up especially.
TLover Monday, 14 June 2010
J. Scarlet Monday, 14 June 2010
This is really good! It has a lot of detail!
Liv Bronte Sunday, 13 June 2010
How do you get so many comments? :(
AlaskaEverfall Saturday, 12 June 2010
Wow! =)
Gr8 work! =)
Hahaha! I liked Nathan! =)
He seems so outgoing and confident... it reminds me of a boy in my school! =)
But seriously... such guts! Just walk up 2 a random girl and start a conversation! =P
I wish could do tht.... ='(
I'm going 2 read the rest when I have time...
Keep writing, becasue I noticed that the book was only 3 chapters long!
Have fun!
Rhose Whyte
Katie Mae Thursday, 10 June 2010
Don't forget to look over your grammar and spelling - other than that, looks good so far!
morgan!!!!!!!! Wednesday, 9 June 2010
the bookis so good i wish i could write like you
MaddieBear c: Wednesday, 9 June 2010
omg ur books it like awesome!!! plz read my book called, the seeing
Cass Tuesday, 8 June 2010
sorry, forgot to rate!
Cass Tuesday, 8 June 2010
i love this! keep writing please! :]
livelovelaugh Tuesday, 8 June 2010
I love ur story :D keep writing im hooked :D!!!
SW Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Ahh, this is awesome! So interesting(: I love love love it!
kittenlove123 Tuesday, 8 June 2010
this is awesome!
I love Nate... don't know why though... he just seems like an awesome guy ^_^
but I really didn't like how she rejected him... poor Nate lol
oh well
this is still awesome though! I love your style of writing
and this is definitely going on my favorites :D
silent surrender Tuesday, 8 June 2010
I love this!

It's so cute, and I really am enjoying the writing style. It seems to be original with your own twist to make it your own, so good job on that. The characters are well-developed, although it would be nice to see a little bit more information about your main character. All in all, really great! Keep it up. And thanks for reading my story.

Keep writing!
Jamie Monster Tuesday, 8 June 2010
This is adorable. I adore it. (:
Grace Chung Tuesday, 8 June 2010
This reminds me of a book called Willow, and so far, I'm loving this book! Good job!! :)
Milk Cookies Tuesday, 8 June 2010
This is so cute! You are good :)
Whisper in the Night Monday, 7 June 2010
wow! this is really great! its true that some guys just dont take "no" for an answer, and those guys are usually the keepers. :) i love this!
*~Whisper In The Night~*
Barry Kidwell Monday, 7 June 2010
realy good :) i cant wait untill you post more
wiggygurl Monday, 7 June 2010
Very good. I enjoyed this because it seems like it could really happen. Hope to read more. Watch for minor grammar errors.

check out an unexpected romance
Mad_Beck Monday, 7 June 2010
Really good so far, Keep writing! :D
BallyWackaDoAhA!LoL Monday, 7 June 2010
I love it! keep writing I'll be reading :P haha
JellyMuffin Monday, 7 June 2010
pretty good so far :D <3
Liv Bronte Monday, 7 June 2010
This is really good! It is a great start and I can tell it will be really good. Out of the whole thing I think I found two grammer errors but that is the only thing. Great job and I can't wait to keep reading!!

Liv Bronte
katiealyssa. Monday, 7 June 2010
Ugh, Lia. That's so sad. I love this so far! It's so good. A lot of description.
LoveStoryGirlxx Sunday, 6 June 2010
Forgot to rate it so here it is ------>
LoveStoryGirlxx Sunday, 6 June 2010
Love thiss!! lol Nate sounds so annoying i HAVE to see how this turns out! awwww poor Lia
Denz Sunday, 6 June 2010
I'm gonna wait for another chapter :)
GoAskAlice Sunday, 6 June 2010
I accidentally screwed up my rating last time, sorry Anna *sad puppy dog face in hopes you'll forgive me*
DoveLove Sunday, 6 June 2010
Poor poor Lia, if she could only see how shes hurting her mother. I think Claire is a bit mean but a well rounded character. Great Job!
Kami<3 Sunday, 6 June 2010
I love it! I can relate to this in so many ways. Lia is my favorite character so far!
MaryL. Sunday, 6 June 2010
I love this! Nate seems unbelievably cute! Keep it up!
MovedtoInkpop Sunday, 6 June 2010
Great start so far!
Heather M. Sunday, 6 June 2010
Oh this is just amazing.
Janelle Sunday, 6 June 2010
Wow this is amzing. I love how your wrote it all out. The details were just right and I cannot wait till you have more chapters out! keep it up!
MTJunkie Sunday, 6 June 2010
This is really beautiful. I'm excited to see where you go with this!
Spindlegal Sunday, 6 June 2010
I love it! My cousin is anorexic, her name is Leah. We need to chat some more! Haha good job on this book, really good :)))
The Lina Sunday, 6 June 2010
Really, really good. I love the writing, it kept me interested the whole time. I can tell you did a lot of research on anorexia. The detail is perfect: not too much, not too little. I also like how you used present tense.
something Sunday, 6 June 2010
This was an amazing first chapter, the details were so elegantly placed with the right amount, too. Plus the characters seem really interesting. I'll be reading more!
Adorkable Saturday, 5 June 2010
I FREAKING LOVE IT!! This is SO amazing! Annnd, I can't wait for more! Annnnd I LOVE YOU! :)
Brittanythewriter Saturday, 5 June 2010
I like it!!! Nate sounds funny
Annabel Saturday, 5 June 2010
Sorry for the crappy grammar, I'm sending this into my seditor tomorrow. I'll upload a new and improved version ASAP ^U^
movieslover Saturday, 5 June 2010
love love love it!!!!
GoAskAlice Friday, 4 June 2010
Oh, Anna I love it! It's kinda SDish, but I'd expect that from you! It's your inspiration, after all!
I'll be waiting for more,
~Cassidy ^_^
Black Whispers Friday, 4 June 2010
oh...u stop there..? MORE. Paragraph spacing was a teensy isssue that distracted my immature brain....maybe fixing it would make it 100% better..not saying it wasn't good.. :D IT WAS..!
Denz Friday, 4 June 2010
it's an interesting story but there's a small problem, be careful with your spellings and grammar. I'll be waiting for chapter 2
Angelena Fox-Francisco Wednesday, 18 August 2010
Ah... you're making me hungry!!!

I like this chapter =)
637974 Friday, 13 August 2010
This Rocks!
Read Mine?
SarahKate Thursday, 12 August 2010
Aww it's so cool! I feel bad for Clair's home life, but I have a feeling it's about to get a whole lot better! :D Great job so far!
Avalon Maya. Saturday, 7 August 2010
That boy cant stop talkin'! :D tiz hilarious!
Jessica Mitch Tuesday, 29 June 2010
Love it. Just freakin LOVE IT hahaha.
Love Lots
A-Jay Tuesday, 22 June 2010
really like...mountains of food to molehills...can see that in my head.
♥, Emily Thursday, 17 June 2010
It's actually at a pretty good speed right now...:)
Joselyn Snow Monday, 14 June 2010
i don't think its too rushed, very good speed.

i like Nate :)
for some reason he kinda seems like a cute little nerd for some reason. I'm not really sure why though...but tis a good thing don't worry
V.P. Boganski Monday, 14 June 2010
Splendid, not to rushed at all =)
Adorkable Sunday, 13 June 2010
I LOVE nate!! Tehe, I love this book! I don't think it's too rushed.
nah man Friday, 11 June 2010
I think Nate's cool for a girl like her. I really enjoyed your story. You should check for a few surface errors though. Otherwise, really good!
Erin Arnett Wednesday, 9 June 2010
Nate sounds like a cutie:) I like his cockiness. I don't think it's going to fast. They went out to dinner, is all. Not like they kissed. Anyway, great sofar :)
kittenlove123 Tuesday, 8 June 2010
I love Nate!
he's what the guys should be like these days- confident, sweet, funny

it seems slightly rushed... but only the asking to dinner part
the rest is really good :D
LoveStoryGirlxx Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Haha gotta love Nate! lol i don't think its too rush its just about right :)
Brittanythewriter Tuesday, 8 June 2010
I like him
Denz Monday, 7 June 2010
5 stars for this wonderful story. I don't know, but for me, Nate is just being cute, super cute.
C.C Phoenixx Monday, 7 June 2010
Hey, like the story so far and Nate, but seems a tad too rushed. Other than that it's awesome, keep writing!

5 stars

p.s: Thanks for the comment and rating on Blood Rush! Really appreciate it! :]
Chrissy Grace Monday, 7 June 2010
haha, gotta love Nate!he reminds me A LOT of one of my best friends, Jeff, so its like i already know him!i hate burritos, but now i rlly want 1!
i LOVE the writing!update soon!
Zack D. Monday, 7 June 2010
Awesome writing!!! I loved it. PLEASE ADD MORE!! I don't think it's too rushed... just right. Nate is a really funny character.
Gillian Annie Monday, 7 June 2010
i loooooooooooove it! it is a bit rushed, and Nate annoys me. not much, but he seems to never shut up and jump to things. hee hee he would be like my sister in guy form
The Lina Monday, 7 June 2010
Ah, I like Nate.
But it does seem a bit rushed, and I'm not sure I would just call a random guy I met once and go out on a date with him.
Haha, I never thought a burrito could be that good :P

When the mom says, "Your too difficult", "Your" should be "You're". And when Nate says, "You know, your really pretty", "your" should be "you're" again.

Barry Kidwell Monday, 7 June 2010
totaly awesome :), and i liked nate, it did feel like he rushed it, but not too crazy :) cant wate till u post more
katiealyssa. Monday, 7 June 2010
Eh, it's a little rushed, but it seems like Nate's personality. I liked it. (:
HaileyAnn♥ Saturday, 11 August 2012
SO good so far! I love the characters, they are very well portrayed.
Aislinn Miller Sunday, 12 December 2010
I most definitely agree with Kaisa. I wasn't sure how sane he was but now i think it was all leading up to him being cute :)
Angelena Fox-Francisco Wednesday, 18 August 2010
Nate is awesome, he and Claire are perfect together.
637974 Friday, 13 August 2010
Totally cool :D
Avalon Maya. Saturday, 7 August 2010
Okay, I am not as wierded out by Nate's cattering now. It was wierd, last chapter with him going on about eggs, but he isnt so wierd now.
Shreya S. Monday, 2 August 2010
I love it so far, I love Nate's character..
♥Lexxi Kay Wednesday, 7 July 2010
I love it! Haha I love Nate
Mizz Jazz Tuesday, 6 July 2010
Nate is quite a character he's already growing on me :)
sunshinedrops Saturday, 3 July 2010
what a sweety
Jessica Mitch Tuesday, 29 June 2010
LOLN. I <3 Nate!! :D
Chrissy Grace Friday, 25 June 2010
This just keeps getting better and better! Ha, I love Nate! Not much has changed since my last review; it's still awesome!
If you liked "My Valstarra", then would you mind checking out "Struck"? I'd love your opinion on it!
Juliette LaBelle Monday, 21 June 2010
Very interesting. I enjoy how you word your sentences. You give simple description a little bit of life. Keep going. Maybe you could go into further detail when describing the feelings they share. How Claire feels when Nate looks at her, or when they hold hands. There are a few typos, but other than that it's good.
Daylight Dreamer Sunday, 20 June 2010
I like this a lot, although Nate did come off a little weird at first... I still don't know what to think of him. Write more! :)
becc Sunday, 20 June 2010
this is really good. I'm glad I took that little extra bit of time and read this.
AlaskaEverfall Thursday, 17 June 2010
AWEUM!!! =)
Rhose Whyte
♥, Emily Thursday, 17 June 2010
U def should rite more!!!! :D
Read/Rate/Comment Shadows Among Shadows? Thx
Daniel Joseph Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Good work! You bring the characters to life. Interesting and good reading
Zack D. Tuesday, 15 June 2010
This is awesome...LOVE IT! I adding you to my favorites, this is so good!!
becc Tuesday, 15 June 2010
I really like it! Keep on writing!
Sandra Andover Monday, 14 June 2010
This is really amazing. I almost feel that you know someone who's anorexic - I like how you portray the differences between your main character and her sister. Very good. Looking forward to reading more.
V.P. Boganski Monday, 14 June 2010
Very good, splendid indeed =)
sweetpea Sunday, 13 June 2010
I love this. (:
please post more soon.

if you have time could you please read/rate A Princess Forgotten? thanks
Adorkable Sunday, 13 June 2010
Daisy Mae Friday, 11 June 2010
oh wow! this looked good just in the summary, but it was so much better when i read it!!! love the plot, and i want to know what happens next :) a must read for the romance lover :)
Jordan Yates Thursday, 10 June 2010
I really like your book! It's got a really good plot so far! Keep writing!
J. N. M. Thursday, 10 June 2010
This is really, good. Tell me when you post more?
Raquel Marin Wednesday, 9 June 2010
I love this a lot! Can't wait to see where this leads to! If you can, would you read my book called Harmony Honor Destruction? Thanks C:
5 STARS!!!!!!
sammy ray Wednesday, 9 June 2010
i like it! keep it up, i'm definitely interested now!
Adrian D. Ireland Wednesday, 9 June 2010
Holy shoot! i'm loving this, and i cant wait for more! pleeeeeeeeeease keep going aand add more soon! Read my book, Love on the WestCoast and comment!
Lynette Heureux Wednesday, 9 June 2010
ooooooh myyyyy goooooosh! i love it!!! please tell me when you write more!!!
sweettart224 Wednesday, 9 June 2010
aghhh!!!!!! were are the rest of the chapters?! I wanted to keep reading but they dissapeared!!! Haha, im way to dramatic:) i love it and i cant wait for the next chapters to be up:)
Emilie Cavin Tuesday, 8 June 2010
This is SO cute! and I Loooove Nate, and the NAME Nate. :) So FIVE STARS!
kittenlove123 Tuesday, 8 June 2010
still love Nate!!!
he's simply adorable :D

I'm actually starting to like Claire now that she likes Nate
Awesome job!
mk. saucier Tuesday, 8 June 2010
i enjoyed the first few pages :)

ps: yes in my book it is modern time!
The Lina Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Nate's so cute! Haha, I'm jealous of Claire.

But when Nate meets Barbara, you're spelling his name "Nathan" when in the earlier chapters it was spelt "Nathen". I'm just a bit confused about that.
Brittanythewriter Tuesday, 8 June 2010
I love him!!!

And I go to the store at 3am thank you very much ha-ha it was oncce and I was with my mom and sister good times good times :)
katiealyssa. Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Nate's a sweetheart. (: He's adorable! And funny. Just, aw.
Well, I loved this chapter! You had like one unecessary thing. It was something like, "I clicked the end button, producing another beep." I don't think you really need the beep part. (: But, whatever. Love it!
LoveStoryGirlxx Tuesday, 8 June 2010
Ahhhhhhhhhh Nate is the biggest sweetheart ever!
Aislinn Miller Sunday, 12 December 2010
yay chester :) there better be more of this irish man later on.
represent! lol
Angelena Fox-Francisco Wednesday, 18 August 2010
haha Chester is great. Maybe the new chapter title could do with something about Claire wanting Nate to kiss her??? I don't know. Love your book!!!
637974 Friday, 13 August 2010
This is totally cool!
Adorkable Wednesday, 11 August 2010
Tehe. Chester seems cute. I adore Irish people :D
Shreya S. Tuesday, 10 August 2010
haha.. I like Chester, so funnyy!! And Im glad you wrote a new chapter..!!
Cass Tuesday, 10 August 2010
Great Chapter! Aw...I love Chester! Write more soon! :]
Avalon Maya. Monday, 9 August 2010
Awww... he's so sweet. i dont care if he didnt kiss her, he's a sweet heart. and Chester is AWESOME! he's funny as!
Honey121 Monday, 25 October 2010
You have got to write moorre!!! You just have to! Plsss your sooo gooood! As AnnmarieM said it's really easy to understand which is really good. You don't want it to be confusing. I like how Claire meet Nate in the mall. He just pops up and starts talking to her! And now they go out! I'll be waiting for more! :)
AnnmarieM Saturday, 2 October 2010
Hiya :) I really really like this book - I love your writing style because it's easy to read and get into. It keeps you interested, or maybe it's just because I have a weird fascination with this subject like Lia :p Your character development is really interesting and I especially like how you show Lia's faults instead of just making her some perfect character or another mary-sue. So yeah, keep it up and good job :)

If you have time, maybe you could check out and comment on my book Imprint? Thanks x
Daphne G Sunday, 26 September 2010
Poor Claire.
Nate is awesome
Great book
write more
shelby 123 Tuesday, 7 September 2010
right more/
GoAskAlice Tuesday, 7 September 2010
Lia, Lia, Lia QQ
Angelena Fox-Francisco Thursday, 19 August 2010
The suspense is gonna kill me!!! Your book is amazing
Nadia Lino Wednesday, 18 August 2010
wow!your book was great i especially liked the way you developed your charecter lia:)
could you check out my book, playing with puppets - comment and rate plz:)
Lacey Raine Saturday, 14 August 2010
Loving it... read mine???
please write more! xx
637974 Friday, 13 August 2010
Wicked! :D
Read Mine?
Booklover_Belle Friday, 13 August 2010
I JUST started reading your book and I HAVE TO SAY this is really, really good.

You've edited it amazingly, no grammatical mistakes at all except the chapters are a little short.
A little more action, y'know?

Anyway, I ADORE Chester. He's a marvelous character, you can develop him very well.
Icing on the cake!
Keep it up, hun! :)
nachocamacho Thursday, 12 August 2010
I was gonna comment earlier but i didn't feellike logging in. :) i love this so far. I like Nate's character a lot. Like how he just takes a hold of things and I love his confidence. Congrats on being the like picked book or whatever it's called. Keep wrting I really like this so far. (:
Avalon Maya. Wednesday, 11 August 2010
Aww... i feel really sorry for Claire. Poor girl.
Angelena Fox-Francisco Friday, 24 December 2010
OH MY GOSH!!! what's going on with lia?
sunshinedrops Friday, 10 December 2010
i fell so bad for lia, but OH MY GOD THEY KISSED AWSOME and Alice Wright is right drama will insue.
637974 Thursday, 4 November 2010
Yay! Another chapter!
They kissed :D
Honey121 Thursday, 4 November 2010
I like it!!! :) can't wait to know what's going to happen to lia and how her moms going to yell at her!!!
GoAskAlice Thursday, 4 November 2010
Yes! They FINALLY kissed!
Oh crap, here we go. . . Drama shall insue, poor Leah. . .
637974 Saturday, 19 February 2011
Dude, this chapter is frickin awesome! I loveloveloved it
Sorry, I suck at long comments :(
sTiCkFiGuRe Saturday, 1 January 2011
Anna, you write like a queen.
I think this chapter was one of your best! Don't doubt yourself sweetie. ;)
I really hope Lia pulls through this becuase she's such an awesome character and it's pain me to see her go... :'(
I'll be following closely becuase this is most definately my favorit ebook up on WoP ATM...
Can't wait for another chapter!!
Angelena Fox-Francisco Friday, 24 December 2010
I love it! Feel so bad for Lia, though, and her family. They're all going through so much pain...
sweettart224 Friday, 24 December 2010
I havent read this in a LONGGGG time, and i'm so happy that I started reading again!(: Please check out my new book called Trapped(title still in progress) it would mean alot to me for your feed back
Happy Holidays,
<3 sweettart224
GoAskAlice Sunday, 19 December 2010
Not your best chapter?! Erin, this is brilliant! The description is phenomenal, especially where Claire is standing in line and talking about how life should always be so straight forward! I ADORE this chapter, even if there isn't any Nate-sensory overload!
I really can't find a flaw besides like, body and grammatical, but big effin deal! :P
I love this!
Honey121 Wednesday, 15 December 2010
Hahaha poor Lia! I was just thinking about you and then you put your new chapter what coincidence! Hahahaha
I will be waiting for more!
Honey121 Wednesday, 15 December 2010
Hahaha poor Lia! I was just thinking about you and then you put your new chapter what coincidence! Hahahaha
I will be waiting for more!

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