[i2s2bwy sequel] i'm too scared to let you go
Author: twelvetwix

Chapter 4
a day at the zoo

on a monday afternoon after school, we stayed in justin's truck as we waited for him. justin loved my truck and always drove it more than his car, we decided to trade. it felt being in a small car that matched me. i felt like people were judging me in a huge truck and thought i was a lesbian or something.
    i looked at the time and it was already 2:33. justin was supposed to be done by now. me and justin were texting each other and he got caught. he was supposed to be done three minutes ago. why was he taking so long? i looked up from scratching my leg and finally saw justin walking. he hopped into the truck and gave me a kiss.

me: sorry for getting you in trouble.

justin: it's okay.

me: how was detention?

justin: oh, i didn't have detention. my teacher's niece <i>loved</i> shiny so much that my teacher just wanted a picture of me.

me: then what took you so long?

justin: i was taking a dump.

    i started giggling and i got startled with a familar voice. i looked behind me and saw stacey and jerome eating a pb&j sandwich. where the fxck did they get that?

jerome: bro, that's gross. we're eating here.

justin: oh yeah. you know my shxt looked so weird. it was a very little brown-ish color. when i looked in the toilet, it reminded me of peanut butter.

    i looked through the rear-view mirror and saw stacey and jerome trying their hardest not to throw up. they put their sandwich away and closed their eyes. even i was feeling a little whoozy. the image of his shxt stayed in my head. gross.

me: omg justin.

justin: i'm sorry you guys.

    we heard yelling from behind us. it was starting to get me light headed. i knew who was yelling. it was the others. zaileen, jeremy, kat and steven were in the back. they were yelling and telling justin to just go. justin got out of the truck and went to the back to yell at them. while he was gone, i started getting better and so did stacey and jerome. when he came back, he gave me a bottle of water.

justin: here. for you to calm down or whatever.

me: oh i'm all good now.

justin: are you sure? i don't want you to throw up all over the car.

me: it's okay.

    so with my word, justin started up the car and exited the student parking lot. we made our way down the road and we almost reached our neighborhood. usually we'd go to justin's house which zaileen called "our club house" because we were there if we weren't anywhere else cruising and no one was usually home. when we passed our exit, i started getting confused.

me: justin, where are we going?

justin: zoo.

me: why?

justin: me and the guys felt like it.

me: and why didn't you tell me?

justin: that's my point. i knew if we told you, all you girls would disagree.

me: okay fine. why are we going to the zoo?

justin: `cause we really wanted to go to the zoo.

me: and why?

justin: we were watching animal planet last night together and we saw all the cool animals.

me: you guys come up with the most random things.

justin: you still love me right?

me: of course i do.

* * * * * * * * * *

we got to the zoo and the guys started acting like little kids. they were pulling us towards all the animals. they also tried imitating the animals. so stupid! justin pulled me to look at the tigers. it started coming towards us and justin waved at it. the tigers started roaring and justin started screaming and ran away.
after an hour looking at the animals, we decided to grab a snack. we went to a consetion stand to grab some shave ice and we just stayed on little tables all together and talked stories.

steven: there was this hot girl. damn, when she bent down to tie her shoes, i just wanted to grab her and take her to you truck.

justin: the one with her family? the one wearing pink?

    i looked at him. he gave me a smile and tried to kiss me but i dogded it and sat on the opposite side of the table. he knew i was mad and got up. he grabbed my hand to tell me he wanted to talk on the side. at first, i didn't want to do it but i was scared that it would turn into a big fight.

justin: i'm sorry okay?

me: yeah, that girl was pretty. you should've asked her for her number.

justin: omg mailyn. not now.

me: oh, you didn't want to ask her for her number because you were with your girlfriend?

justin: but even it my girlfriend wasn't with me, i still wouldn't ask her for her number. <i>i have a girlfriend.</i>

me: why don't you just break up with her then?

justin: i don't want to. i don't ever wanna break up with her.

me: were you even listening to me when you saw that girl?

    i looked at him. i saw that he was trying to remember. then he started frowning and shook his head.

justin: i'm sorry.

me: i was saying that i was glad that we did thi. we spent a great day having fun without fighting, and that i loved you so much.

justin: i'm sorry. i love you too.

me: whatever. you know justin, sometimes i don't really know if you really mean it when you tell me you love me. i really want you believe you but your actions says something else.

justin: what are you trying to say?

me: i don't know. what happened to our one fight per week?

justin: you know i hate it when we fight and you blame me. i sometimes think that you belong to someone better.

    i was shocked to hear this. he <b>NEVER</b> give up on me. for some reason, i started to cry.

me: what are you trying to say?

justin: i think that you should try find someone better. to be honest, i think we should take a break right now. i wanna know if there's someone else better for you that treats you like a princess and it looks like i'm not doing a great job at it.

    he tried to hug me but i just ran. i ran like my life depended on it. <i>there's someone else better for you</i> just kept replaying in my head. what happened to <i>i don't ever want to break up with her</i>? please be another quick break up. <i><u>please</i></u>??

 

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