Being For The Benefit Of Paramount Kites
Author: Sega Parks

Chapter 4

   Andy and Palma snickered artfully when Mr. Connery turned his back to the class, walking over to the chalkboard.  Andy skillfully slid his hand up her skirt, playing with the outline of her panties. She tried her darnedest not to make any noise, but she couldn't help but make one soft moan. No one seemed to pay any attention to them.

"I see what you're doing." Jen Nguyen said, who sat on the other side of Palma. "Not appropriate."
"Then don't watch." Andy said, moving his hand far up Palma's leg.

Jen just smiled. "Vincent Gaye is taking me to homecoming."

"Ooh, he's cute." Palma grinned. "Smart choice."

"Thanks." Jen said, focusing her attention back to Connery who was setting up the overhead.

Andy stared at Connery. Andy was the top student in his class, but Connery didn't seem to be impressed. In fact, Connery seemed to have been giving Andy extra homework to do. What was worse was than instead of calling on him whenever he raised his hand to answer the questions, Connery would call on the dumb students in the back of the class,

When Holly told Andy at the first football game that he finally met a girl he couldn't impress, he had also met a science teacher he couldn't impress.

Connery went around the class to pass out papers of previous homework to the students. When he came to Andy, he gave him stacks of paper to pass back to his row. Andy took the first five pages of homework before handing it back to Dexter Kirkpatrick. He didn't understand how Dexter got into AP Biology. Dexter was an idiot as far as anyone could see.

  "How was your day, Mr. Connery?" Jen asked dutifully.

Connery was a man who looked to be in his early sixties and had white hair.

"Not good." he said solemnly. "My father died."

"I'm sorry." Andy and Jen said in unison.

They both exchanged amused looks.

"Do you wanna know how old he was?" Connery asked.

"Sure." said Jen.

  "A hundred and four."

Andy whistled. "And I thought my parents were old."

Connery actually laughed at his comment. "Well, you thought wrong. Guess how old my parents where when they married."

"What?" Palma asked curiously. 

"Fourteen and twenty-one." he answered. "What do you think about that?"

"I call that pedophilia." Andy muttered under his breath, attempting to be funny.

"Who said that!?" Connery asked angrily.

No one answered.
"Do you know, Andy?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at him.

"Yes." Andy sighed. "I guess I'll be honest."

"Good." Connery said. "Then who was it?"

Andy paused for a second, looking guilty. "It was Dexter."
He immediately turned around and pointed to Dexter who just sat there looking stupid.

 Connery pointed to the classroom. "Mr. Kirkpatrick, you just earned yourself a trip to the dean's office."

"But I didn't---" Dexter tried to protest, but Connery cut him off.

"Come with me." he said sternly.

"It was Andy!" Dexter yelled.

  Connery just shook his head. "It's not good to blame others for their mistakes."

And with that, Connery beckoned Dexter to get out of his seat. As they were walking out of the class, Dexter shot Andy a look. "I'll kill you."

"Sorry, dude." Andy said apathetically. "You gots to bounce up out of here."

"Come on, Dexter." Connery said.

"That's right." Andy continued. "Walk on out, walk on out."

 When they left, Palma turned to Andy. "Why would you lie?"

"I didn't want to get in trouble." Andy defended. "I'm already on his bad side. I didn't mean to say that about his dad. I was just trying to be funny."

Palma rolled her green eyes. "Whatever."

Andy thought about how many times he had tried impressing Connery. Instead of doing a one page essay on why stem cells is beneficial, he ended up doing a four page essay on it.
He remembered when he first came into the classroom, Connery immediately judged him. Just because he allowed Jen to sit on his lap on their spare time, Connery started lecturing him on how it was science class not a strip joint. Even when he was the first and only person in their class to get every single question right on the brain teaser worksheet, Connery still eyed him with that same stern expression.


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