True Memoirs of A Liar 2: Sacrifice
Author: C Lawson

Chapter 29
Letters of Love pt.2

“Jed?” I called in a depressed manner.  I cleared my throat and sat up.  Jed was there, no traces of humor in his aging face. “Can you get me a piece of paper and a pen, please?” He nodded, almost in a smug, sly way and turned out of my room.  Only moments later he was there again, holding the materials I’d requested out for me.  I gingerly took them in my hands and thanked him.  He took my gratitude as a dismissal.  My hands quivered as I thought of what to write.  I took a deep breath and tried to be honest.

Alex,

            Please don’t do this.  We can’t do this.  I still don’t understand why you’re here.  Just leave things the way they are instead of trying to get things back to the way they were.

            I won’t meet you at Bellary’s.  So don’t wait for me.  And I forgive you, Alex, but don’t think that I’m not furious.  I could kill you for being so foolish!  You don’t know anything and you jump into my life again, just wanting to be forgiven.  You are not in the world you know, anymore.

            You’re in my hell now.  My nightmare.  And I have nothing else to say to you.

                                                            Still yours,

                                                                        Bright Eyes

            My eyes blurred over while I scribbled down my thoughts, my anger taking over as I got closer and closer to the end of the short letter.  I wiped the back of my hand across my eyes and tried to get some sleep.  I woke up in a groggy state.  Immediately, I felt around for the letter I’d written Alex last night.  But I couldn’t find it.  Samuel waltzed into my room just as the lightbulb began to flicker out in a very creepy fashion.  Samuel flicked it lightly and it beamed a bright yellow that I squinted against until my eyes adjusted.

            I groaned. “Rise and shine!” Samuel exclaimed loudly.  I rolled over to face him head-on and threw a pillow at his head.

            “No,” I replied in a matter-of-fact tone. “I do not want to rise and I do not want to shine. Go away.  I want to sleep.” I moaned as if I were in pain.  But Samuel was used to this and flung the covers off of me anyway.  I kicked him in the stomach. “Go away!  I’m trying to sleep!” I cried, trying to yank the comforter back into place.

            “You’ve got things to do today. Get up,” Samuel insisted; I could tell he was losing his patience. “I have a letter for you.” I bolted straight up, stumbling a little as I fell to my knees when I jumped out of the bed too quickly.  Samuel smiled triumphantly, knowing he’d won.  I didn’t care who won.  I wanted that letter.

            “Where?” I asked, holding my hand out for it.  Samuel shook his head.

            “Get dressed first,” he ordered. I rolled my eyes.

            “Wait, how did I get a letter when I haven’t even sent back the other one?” I asked, scratching the skin of my elbow lightly and tugging down the hem of my pajama shorts.

            “I gave it to him. You happy? Now, get dressed.” I crossed my arms and stomped off to the bathroom.  I snagged a pair of old jeans and a sweatshirt. I showered in a haste, barely paying any real attention to what I was doing.  I ran out of the bathroom and practically flung myself at Samuel.

            “Letter, letter, letter, letter… Please,” I added at the last second.  He handed me the envelope and I tore it open at once, scanning it in a hurry.

My Bright Eyes,

            Of course we can do this. There’s nothing else for us to do but be with each other. We are so good together and I know you know it. I’m not trying to get things to the way they used to be.  I’m trying to get things to the way they should be.

            Foolish? You are the foolish one. Running off to meet your maker when could have just stayed with me! For such a clever little girl you can be extremely stupid.

            I reread your letter over and over again, trying in a futile attempt to decipher the inner-workings of your head. I know more than you think. You are the one that is seeing things wrong.

            I’m not in hell, by the way, if I was, my angel wouldn’t be here. I’m going to send a Tanner Ryan book to you. It was signed by him. I hope you like it. I took the liberty of book marking a few of the poems I thought you would enjoy.  Please understand, I’m not here to hurt you.

                                                                        All my love,

                                                                                    Alex 

            I shook my head the entire time I was reading the letter.  I bit my lip until I tasted blood and felt my face flush with embarrassment.  He sounded so sincere.  I wanted to write him back immediately.  I ripped the letter to pieces and threw them angrily onto the floor.  Lena skipped around the corner and stopped dead in her tracks as she watched me contemplate actually stomping on the torn letter sections.

            “What happened?” she asked, taking a few wary steps forward.  I held up a restraining finger and she came to a quick halt again.

            “It’s Alex.  Again,” I said, sitting down on the plush carpet.  Lena nodded and sat down next to me, crossing her legs and letting her elbows dig into her knees as her face rested in her hands.  I shrugged and she just watched me.

            “I just came from his room.  He’s nice.  I like him.” I slowly turned my head to look at her.  No malice or displeasure showed in my gaze.  I wasn’t mad at her.  I knew if Lena had gone into Alex’s room it’s because he’d asked her. “He talked about you for a little bit.  Then he talked about himself for a little bit when I asked him questions.  He’s going to teach me some self-defense moves.  Maybe soon I can spar with you.”

            “How often are you going to be over there?” I wondered.  Though his room was only three doors down, it seemed more like three miles.

            “If you don’t want me to go, Camille, then I won’t.  I’ve known you longer.  I like you better, I think.” I smiled, then grinned widely, then I chuckled and burst out laughing.

            “No,” I started when I’d gotten myself mostly under control, “it’s nothing like that.  I just wanted to know so I wouldn’t worry about where you were.” Ever since I’d saved her from the goon, Mr. Stone had been just salivating at the mouth for a chance to kill Lena.  It made me anxious to leave her alone.  Ever. “Do you mind staying with me until tonight?  Keep me company or something?” Lena nodded enthusiastically and scooted closer to me, going into a recap of her day in intimate detail.  She used her hands a lot and her facial expressions made me smile.  Lena sort of idolized me, picturing me as some kind of savior angel.  I didn’t want to break her idea of what good was, so I let her think whatever she wanted to think.

 

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