the world within me
Author: Ella

Chapter 101
Our Father

Each night before I sit to pray
I think about my list
Of never ending requests
What else could I miss
I dread it just thinking
Hoping to get it over
When my eyes just want to close
And my mind could only hover

I donít come in excitement
In wonderment and awe
To talk to my dear father
That I didnít even adore

I know what prayer should be like
Not some mechanical list of things
But a joyful wondrous exchange
That makes our hearts sing

Though I may be sinful
Unworthy and wild
But now I can come
To the father as a child

Every time I think of singing to Him
I feel so very happy
To be able to express my love
In words not too many

But when I think of that nightly prayer
It soon becomes a burden
As if too much is on my mind
That my prayers should be shortened

And when I didnít have the chance to pray
I felt such a searing loss
And realised I took for granted
The privilege I have without paying the cost

But when I did begin to pray again
How joyful it did feel
To just be free to approach my father
Not just before every meal

Some days I could just sit in His presence
With no words to say
For how beautiful how great
In an indescribable way

Sadly I forget
What prayer should always be
And slip back to finding it a burden
And a half hearted plea

Each day I must remind myself
That if I am going to say
Some list of things and not of love
Then I might as well not pray

But I pray that I will always remember
That adoration and that praise
That fills my soul and gives me a joy
No matter what I should face

 

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