Americas heart attack, My Comspiracy Theory (please rate)
Author: Lucas giddens

Chapter 8
Worldly Ways


    One of the many problems I have is the want to be able to fit in with the world once again.  In order to be accepted by others I found out it is easier to feel like you mean something to people in the world if you have the luxuries that we have in America or any were really.  You know the eye candy.   The things that appeal to the eyes like a lingerie models, big houses, big time money making  jobs, swimming pools, material things, and so on.  For some reason having all that attracts others, you know the American dream so to speak.   

  I am being so insecure wondering on how will I ever be able to have friends again or even get a girlfriend living in a rat infested trailer house, with little income, having the limitations I have now, and keep dwelling on the many mistakes that I have made.  I realized that I was falling back into my old path again.  There is still a part of me that wants the eye candy so to speak.

    I mean come on the odds are so against me here.  Especially here in this time in America.  You know people here judge you on what you have acquired in life or what you will.  I have said that I am a crippled up ole has been.  Well I do believe that I am crippled up, but the not the has been part.  I have achieved many things in the mental aspects of the trials that I have endured.   It is very easy to get yourself caught up in hype s of the world.  I know better but that is an impossible for me to avoid.

    I have noticed that some people think they are better than you because of the items that have been abtained.   I know for a fact that most look at the positions you have or your appearance.   We have a tendency to look and want to have all the luxuries especially when see others that have them.  

      Money hypnotizes me that is for sure, money is power if you think of it.  In the eyes of our children that we are raising they see how everybody chases after it and are fully aware that if you have a great abundance of it you can control others and get all the luxuries that life has to offer.

    Through the television alone they are seeing criminals living large with ease having the luxuries you could possibly want.  The latest movies that I have seen the good guys are the thieves, assassins, sorcerers, werewolves, and even vampires.  Oh yea, I love the special affects in the fantasy movies that introduce all the magic, spells, and other false gods that have super natural powers.  I know I’m nitpicking.  Surely our children know it is make believe.

    But if I do remember correctly, in the bible that I do believe in, God is jealous.  He revealed that in the Ten Commandments that his people are to fallow.  Don’t take my word for it.  Read the whole chapter in the book of Exodus 20.  I have good friends that will talk to me that I believe.  Like Randy Giddens and Scott Roye but anybody has a button that can be pushed so I urge you to seek the truth for your own sake.  Now God cannot be pushed so trust him or anything that he says.

    Let’s face the facts that mankind can be bought.   Money buy’s power.  If you do not believe me or the bible, just look at the American government.  Our own president says whatever will get him reelected.  He or she will make promises that will benefit our pocket books mainly because we are all hypnotized by money so we can obtain more items.   I can’t blame you because I’m the same way but it will cost us in the long run.  I am doing what I can to survive in this life that I have got for living to my own satisfactions.  I am not going to be a self righteous hypocrite if I can help it.  Now later on down in my own biography you will read some hard facts but I have found out through many of my trials and tribulations by ignoring Gods word.   

    I am guilty of this as many more are and it happens to be one of the Ten Commandments he left for his people.  It is written in the book of Exodus chapter 20 versus 17 and it reads, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet over your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.”  That pretty much talks about everything I see that belongs to somebody else.

    You know another thing that bothers me.  The Jewish religion and the Christianity religion are based on the same commandments but yet we are divided.  Jesus Christ said himself in the book of John chapter 14 verses 15, “If you love me, keep my commandments.  The Ten Commandments instantly come to mind when I think of or read that.  Through the little time that I have been a true believer nearly everybody I have talked to have seen the Ten Commandments posted in America but by the way it looks in my eyes is that nearly all of us have gave up.

    What I have come up with on why God has let me live through all the trials and tribulations that I been through.  He knew that I would finally come to the conclusion on admitting how wrong I was on seeking out my own wants and desires.  He made me knowing that I would write this and share my life with others.

   He knew you before you were born.  That is how I would say it.  I don’t want you to take my word for it so you can find it in the Holy Bible in the book of Jeremiah 1:5 and it reads, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”

    I am going to predict that America will fall due to the people who reside in it are not seeking the will of God anymore.  The people who call America home are choosing to fallow their own heart.  Another word the many people want to achieve their own will and not chasing after Gods heart anymore.  Your heart is your own will.  That is how I see it.

    What I think is we are relying on the government to help us more and more as time goes on.  Some Politicians want to have power and control over we the little people like me.  I am very hard headed, stubborn, or however you call it.  I thought that my ways the correct way to go and it would literally take an act of God to change my own thinking process.

    Never the less, it did take that and after many years of fallowing my own heart, you know my own wants and desires that feed the heart that you end up deciding to do because it makes you feel so good.  Yea, my own will! 

   Growing up when I did something wrong I would get punished, you know my butt busted.  I did not intend on getting my step father Glenn Pointer in trouble for child abuse.  One day I got in trouble at school and got sent to the principal’s office.  It was years ago, you know back in the day they would give you swats.  A spanking so to speak but the night before I got a spanking so bad by my step father he left whelps and bruises on me.  Yes it would have been too painful to get a spanking again.  So I refused to take my punishment that I probably did deserve.  It was too long ago to remember what I did.  I told them the truth on what happened.  So the principal got my P.E. coach in there and I pulled my pants down to prove why I refused.  Long story short they called it in and probably threatened my step father of jail time if he ever touched me again.

    The point im trying to make is that there will be times that discipline will be used wrong.  If he would not have punished for my miss behavior I would have never learned to respect or to be moral in life and would have become just another parasite living off the government.  That little thing they call discipline has affected my values in life.  I learned it from the trials and tribulations that I have been through in life. 

    I want to be able to rely on myself and God but I know now that living to my own wants and desires will destroy you in the long run.  I’m glad to have been disciplined in life.  No matter what we do there will always be some that abuse and over indulge in something.  We have to have law and order. 

    I chased after the worldly ways, by choosing to go after my own heart.  You know the phrase that is often used, fallow your own heart.  Nearly every movie that I watch today has something about your heart.  I along with many others did believe  and still do believe that fallowing your own heart, you know the wants and desires that your heart is so desperately seeking is the correct way to go.  Believe me  that only leads to destruction like it did me.

    Hard to believe that some people will only love you for the worldly possessions you have.  Families are tore apart on the possessions o f the world.  One of the main things that will rip apart families is the financial aspects of life.  If you are as fortunate as I am you don’t have to worry about that being very big problem in life.  For some reason that would help me attract a lingerie model, sorry got off track again.  I hate it when that happens.

    I get on the pity wagon so to speak, you know feeling sorry for yourself.  I look around my castle (trailer house) and see mixed matched furniture, a little television, computer, printer, and my best ole buddy, a dog named Max.  I am living in the back of my natural father (Randy Giddens) house.  I try not to be ashamed of myself for still living my parents because I am a firm believer that if you call yourself a man then you need to be able to survive in the world on your own.  But I am very blessed to have a great family because I do need help at times even though I don’t want to admit it.

    Life for me is an easy task to go through physically considering what I have been through because I am fully aware that there are people going through things that are ten times worse.  I have my days when I get down and out, you know depressed.   Like I said the physical part is easy but the mental part is a different story.  So I go to my higher power and that is Jesus Christ and pray, yea you can say what you want but I need all the help I can get.

    Profanity is used much more these days because most of the crowds we hang around with use it.  The only reason I used it was to look or act like one tough guys.  You know to fit in and be cool so to speak, it seemed like they attracted more people.  It has been accepted more and more on television.  Don’t take my word for it just look and find out for yourself.  Not television only but the radio as well.  It has infected my vocabulary alone.

    The world is full of temptations and no man alive today can avoid all the temptations of the world.  Just because we call ourselves Christians don’t mean we will not have problems and the many temptations will not affect us.  In the book of John chapter sixteen verses thirty three Jesus Christ said, “These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.  Try and find another God that has defeated all the temptations in the world and has sacrificed his life for you.  You will find out that all the other so called Gods are selfish and have no mercy.

    Each of us is taught how to act by our fathers, parents, mothers, or your own reasoning.  In America you have that right to choose your own righteous ways no matter what others think as long as you submit to the American nations laws.  We have the freedom here.  I choose to believe what is in the Holy Bible to be correct.  That is my personal relationship I have.  You have the right to choose your own righteous behavior.  I don’t care how, who, or what you think is right but I do know that if we do not stand up together and fight for just our freedom .  We will lose it and be run by a tyrant, dictator, and not have even the right to voice or own faith whatever it may be.


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