Me Against the World
GenreYoung Adult / Drama
Age Rating:R13
Submitted:Sunday, 28 March 2010
Star rating:
 
(1 rating)
Read by:158 different readers
 

Passage from "Me Against the World":
I was shaking. My hand about to drop the gun. I needed to do this. I had to. There wasn't a reason in the world that should have stopped me. I looked at myself in the mirror. Rachelle, had done it, but why couldn't I?
"Stop! Don't do it, Kellie. Please."
I turned. I couldn't see through my tears, but I knew who it was. "I have to do this," I whispered, and pulled the trigger.
* * *
Rachel and Kellie. The queens of the school. Both of them beautiful on the outside, but on the inside a darkness lerks that lead Rachel to the point of suicide.
Now, all alone, Kellie wishes it was her that had killed herself, not Rachelle. She lives day to day, not paying attention to anyone or anything. That is until that dark and mysterious boy starts to hang around her, and her dark thoughts start to go away. Who or what is he? And can he help Kellie?

 

List of chapters

Ch. 0 The Last Time
Ch. 1 Alone
Ch. 2 School...ugh

Comments

*P.S.ILoveYou* Thursday, 7 October 2010
thanks for the comment...i'll definantly start working on my idea development with my characters, i just started typing and got carried away, so thanks for pointing out that it didn't make a lick of sense

~Kira

 
*britts-NAY* Monday, 20 September 2010
Okay, well, I read the prologue and chapter one, and I think you still have some things to smooth out. Like in the prologue (when they're haveing a conversation about a random person) it would have been really nice for your character to explain what was going on. But instead, I got a little confused and didn't particularly want to continue reading. But I did, and I still feel there are things your character needs to explain, and hopefully she will.

So, I do think your story needs some touching up. Hopefully I've helped with that in some way. I'll give you four stars, and I'll save the other two for when your story imporves.

keep writing!
-Britt

Click here for more