Discovered
GenreFantasy / Romance
Age Rating:R15
Submitted:Monday, 23 August 2010
Star rating:
 
(3 ratings)
Read by:228 different readers
 

Zara hasn't had the best life.
When she was three, her parents were murdured in a case still unsolved. But she was rescued by a mysterious boy.
Since then, she's gone from foster home to foster home, never staying long because of her tragic past and fractured heart. She is unable to build any sense of trust, laugh, and even a smile is rare. Now, at 16, she's running out of options. Fast.
Until suddenly, she has too many. When a new boy that seems oddly familiar arrives at her school, and the truth about her parent's murdurs is unearthed, she's not sure what to believe, except one thing. The supernatural is not a myth. It's very real.
Too real.

 

List of chapters

Ch. 0 Prologue
Ch. 1 Chapter 1
Ch. 2 Chapter 2
Ch. 3 Chapter 3
Ch. 4 Chapter 4
Ch. 5 Chapter 5
Ch. 6 Chapter 6
Ch. 7 Chapter 7
Ch. 8 Chapter 8
Ch. 9 Chapter 9

Comments

Lil' miss aphrodite Monday, 20 September 2010
Really good, i especially loved the beginning :) Just a couple of things=
1. in about the fourth paragraph [2.the paragraphs are unclear] you wrote; "the torchure called school." Torchure is actually spelt torture.

3. Beware of tense changes!! You're jumping all over the place. At the beginning of chapt. 1 you wrote 'i woke with a start.' then, you write later on, 'I sigh.' you are going from past tense to present tense. And of course future tense when you are talking about her day at school.

These are the only points though!!
so
1. spelling
2. paragraphs
3. tense changes
!!! Good luck !!!
♥ ♪
 
Diana Archer Thursday, 16 September 2010
Wow. This is great, just great. That's all I can say. You leave me breathless and wanting more. If you were reading this to me, I'd probably start chanting: "More, more, more!" But since I can't chant that, I'll just have to ask nicely. Please write more of your book. There. Please write more. It's great, keep writing and I will read it. I like the length of your chapters, too.
Curly Wurly Monday, 23 August 2010
Amazing! Is he by any chance a vampire?
 
shanniebear Monday, 23 August 2010
Oooo! suspense:) write more soon?
 
Danielle Evans Monday, 23 August 2010
This is a very good start to what will most likely be a very interesting book. Keep up the good work! :D

Danni.xx

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