Comments
The Skies of Aurlin

 
Gillian Annie Wednesday, 11 July 2012
I love poetry that rhymes, is beautiful, and makes sense. This is perfect, and matches all of the above criteria. Great writing(:
 
Steven Cash Monday, 21 May 2012
Nice
Like your style
 
D.E.P. Monday, 21 May 2012
Nicely written. I think we are all victims of too much description.lol. BUt I believe it goes witht he tone of the storyline. Just to clarify, there are some sentences that are just a bit confusing, not that it changes the greatness of the your story: "frowning the frown of a man about to sneeze" seems a bit awkwardly written. Also,I wish you would include the background information in the very beginning and answer these questions: Is the setting on earth? Is it magical or a mundane lifestyle, etc. I enjoyed the description and flow of words. You trully have a gift for not just writing, but putting the words to make a rythem. Thank you for a chapeter that was by far astounding. I wish I had more time to read but then I wouldn't be able to make reviews for other authors on this website. I wish you luck on your novel and message me when your published, maybe as an ebook since its easier? Don't give up!
 
Lea Pembrook Saturday, 12 May 2012
Very nice! The descriptions are amazingly beautiful, but simple enough to not feel overpowering. I will definitely be waiting for another chapter!

One thing I noticed though, that you may want to include, is that in the beginning you stated that wood is rare where they are, yet Feld has paper. I don't know how much or how old or really anything, but that's something people may want to have clarified. Does that make sense? lol

Wonderfully written!
 
Scarlette Noelle Friday, 11 May 2012
Great story!! Sovan is my favorite character ^u^ I would say itís a bit heavy on the description but with those characters, plot, world, and voice who cares?
 
Scarlette Noelle Friday, 11 May 2012
Great story!! Sovan is my favorite character ^u^ I would say itís a bit heavy on the description but with those characters, plot, world, and voice who cares?
 
surfingpanda7 Sunday, 10 March 2013
Just awesome. All I have to say. It was so beautiful and awesome. I also read on your profile that you liked Brandon Sanderson. He's one of my favorite too. Come check out my story the Knights of Night. I think you'd like it.
-Jack
 
Abby Vandiver Sunday, 29 July 2012
You are the best writer! Who would ever believe you are so young. I applaud your talent and I know you will go far. Your work is truly worthy of publishing. I wish I could write like you. Excellent job!
 
EŪryn Grayce Sorenson Tuesday, 10 July 2012
You write beautifully. I love the idea and your style. More please! :)
 
Bob Craton Sunday, 13 May 2012
Excellent start, both interesting and original.
 
Lucifer Morningstar Sunday, 13 May 2012
for only being a 15 year old ferret your story is extremely well written and you show great promise. I have some way to go before I get this good! keep writing and I'll keep reading. good concept, cool world, original, and great use of words. also thanks for your insight on my story "The World Beyond" it was very constructive and i will use it the next time i bumble at my keyboard!
 
K.J.Koops Monday, 21 May 2012
I really enjoyed your chapters overall. :) You set a great tone and are very consistent. If it is one thing that I would nitpick about this though, it would be that sometimes in amongst conversations with characters, you sometimes drive too much detail in there. A few times after reading your description on their actions while they are talking, I felt the need to go back and re-read what was previously said to remember it all. You're very talented and I wish you the best of luck!
 
Bob Craton Monday, 10 September 2012
I just came back to read some more chapters (only 2 were posted when I first commented) and it immediately became clear I needed to upgrade my rating. Your style makes this flow nicely with real flair. I would point out some flaws if only I could find any.

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