Her name was Katie
Author: Auty

Chapter 17
Target weight

"Katie", I say to her the next day, "Do you have Facebook?"
I try to play dumb, pretending that I don't know the answer.
"Yeah, but I never go on it".
"Why?"
"Don't get the time, not with all the exercise and that".
"Do you have pictures on there?"
She pulls a face, "God I look so fat in them. I look bigger than an elephant".
"How much did you weigh then?"
"6 stone something, anyway why you asking all this?"
"I just wondered what you weighed now, you know how much you lost".
I expect her to tell me to piss off and mind my own business but instead she says almost proudly, "19lbs, nearly a stone and a half".
I try to do the maths, taking that away from her original weight. But that means she only weighs 5 stone? No, that can't be right. Then I look at Katie and see how thin she is. Well, actually I suppose it could.
"What's your target weight?" I ask apprehensively, not really wanting to hear the answer.
"4 stone".
I gape at her. My little cousin who is seven years old weighs more than that.
"But Katie, that's nothing. You'll fade away".
She shrugs, "I have to get to that weight, and if it takes me dying to get there, so be it".
I can't believe what I'm hearing. Katie is really willing to die just to be thin?
"Do you want to die?" I ask weekly.
"Sometimes", she says quietly, "When I feel so hungry, I just want it to end. But then I look at myself and see how fat I am and realize I don't care if it kills me. I'd rather be dead and thin that alive and fat".
I swallow. How can I possibly help Katie, if she's thinking like that?

 

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