Author: Quatez Reid
3 days ago on Fort Gillem...
[Specialist Hare hangs up the phone on 1st Lieutenant Boyd...]
Well Sergeant Hopkins, that was a waste of time.
Sergeant Hopkins: Why, what happened?
Hare: So 1Lt. Boyd called to tell me that zombies are running amok out there in Stone Mountain. Oh and their HMWVV died, so we need to dispatch another one.
Sergeant Hopkins: Uhh...Ok. Yeah, that HAD to be a joke. Zombies? What the hell is this, some kinda movie?
Hare: Yeah, I know right. Might call First Sergeant though and get their HMWVV dispatched. Said they needed to slave it.
Sergeant Hopkins: Isnt it...I dunno, the NCOs responsibility to make sure his soldiers check all that stuff during PMCS?
Hare: Heh- I wouldn't-
[A loud pounding sounds at the doors of 9th Chemical Company Headquarters office...]
Sergeant Hopkins: Jeez! Alright, keep your ACUS on! We're not going anywhere!
[Sergeant Hopkins opens the door to First Sergeant McNeal...but he isn't looking his normal self...]
Oh...I didn't know it was you Top...!
First Sergeant: Lts. Boyd and Smith ain't back yet? *cough*
*Sergeant Hopkins and Specialist Hare get at the position of “Parade Rest”*
Negative First Sergeant! They did just call though. Said their HMWVV is deadline cause of a battery fault First Sergeant! ...err...umm...are you feeling alright?
First Sergeant: Damn. Anything else I need to worry bout, *cough* *cough* sides two L.t.s not knowing how to PMCS(Preventive Maintenance Checks and Services)?
Hare: They said zombies were out there First Sergeant! You wouldn't know anything....would you?
First Sergeant: Well, thats just stupid! What they think this is, a movie? Dispatch the HMWVV, but do it to THEIR platoon. If anyone needs me, I'll be at the DFAC (Dining Facility).
Hare: Yes First Sergeant... but are you sure you are fine?! You look a little... pale? And you've been coughing since you got here?
First Sergeant: I'm...good. Startin' to sound like my wife...sheesh...
[When the First Sergeant leaves, they close the door behind him. Once outside, he starts to feel faint and runs to the bushes to throw up...]
Hare: What if they...I dunno, were telling the truth Sergeant?
Sergeant Hopkins: Then that'd make me a God damm monkey's uncle!
Hare: Well, I mean...YOU just saw First Sergeant! What if hes...”turning?”
Sergeant Hopkins: “Turning?” Really?! Really GUY?! THERES NO SUCH THING AS ZOMBIES!
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