The Mischievous Nerd's Guide to World Domination
Author: Stephen Oberauer

Chapter 84

Mistakes are inevitable. After coming back from America I realized that I had not taken enough into account when deciding on the size of land that we should buy. Although hydroponic farms would have meant that we’d have more space, we needed minerals for the farms. Normally that would not be a problem, but the goal in our case was to make a self-sustaining town, meaning that any minerals would have to be mined from our land. It would, however, work out cheaper to buy more land than to try and mine minerals from it, and so that’s what we did; we bought another square kilometre of wine farm to the north of our existing land.

To start, we decided to remove the valuable, top layer of fertile soil from wherever we were going to build and move it elsewhere. BI’s offices would be a very tall, cone shaped building in the centre of the town, using traditional building methods, and the house building factory would be in the north west corner. The construction of those two buildings alone took a year, but during that year we had made lots of progress elsewhere.

The truth system had made a lot of progress. They had done a very detailed assessment of the world’s major religions, and revealed some very interesting statistics, like the percentage of prayers that had been answered per religion, according to the members of those religions. The team also did their own testing, which, so far showed a zero percent of prayers being answered for all religions. Many Christians sent in complaints about the process, because the bible says that God is not to be tested, and therefore was simply avoiding the prayers. The team also revealed statistics about the number of contradictions in religious texts, happiness ratings amongst religious people and also compared the amount of charity work done by religious groups.

So far there was one religion in the lead, although it was debatable as to whether it was a religion or not. Coconut worshipping, a small religion with about a hundred followers, all who believe that coconuts will either take your life, or feed you, depending on whether they land on your head or not. So far, nothing contradictory had been found in the religion’s scriptures.

The culture club had also made a lot of progress, giving us a means by which we could advertise our effort to build a self-sustaining world. Many volunteers signed up to help, and people even offered us money. Since we didn’t feel good about using the money for our own luxury homes, we created a non-profit fund that would only be used to help future efforts to build homes for poor people and not be used to fund our homes directly. It did give us more motivation to work hard on the project, because we had so many people watching us, and expecting us to do great things.

After the two buildings were ready, the pace started to pick up. Our system of building houses out of moulds was very efficient. It also allowed us to be really creative, and do fun things like building houses in animal shapes. After we had our processes sorted out, we could build an entire house in a day. The houses were big, pretty and incredibly strong. To power the town, the BI building in the middle of the town was covered in solar panels. Each house also had solar panels, which rotated to always face the sun during the day. After our hundredth house was built, we had already spent eight million rand on an electrical network with two thousand solar panels.

We built swimming pools, streams and special water collecting contraptions, which would collect rain and dew for drinking and washing. We built various kinds of farms, including dairy, fruit, vegetables, vineyards and grain. We soon decided that it was pointless building such small farms, and so we decided to expand again, and bought another two square kilometres to the west.


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