Behind Closed Doors
Author: Auty

Chapter 13
Trying again

Daddy stays in bed until quite late. For someone who has had so much sleep, he isn't half grumpy when he gets up. He stumbles around swearing and glaring, hitting me a few times because I got in his way.
"Your such a waste of space", he says to me shoving me out of the way.
I say nothing. It's better to keep my mouth shut when he's in these moods. Hopefully when he comes back from the pub he'll be in a better mood. Though I very much doubt it.

I hear a door slam and I wait another five minutes just to be on the safe side. Then I go over to the phone and dial the number, my hands shaking.
"Hello your through to Childline, would you like to speak to someone today?"
This time, it's a mans voice. This throws me off track. What if he's like Daddy?
My throat dry's up and I can't speak.
"I'll put you through to someone you can talk to, please hold the line".
There's a click just like before and a few rings before a voice, "Hello, your through to someone you can talk to at Childline".
It's a woman and she sounds caring. I take a deep breath, "Hi".
It sounds such a feeble pathetic thing to say, I cringe inside myself.
"Hi, what would you like to talk about today?"
I start again, "My, my.."
I can't do it. I can't tell on him.
"Just take your time", the voice says.
"He hits me", I gabble.
"Who hits you?"
"My, my..."
I slam the phone down. I can't tell. I can't even say it out loud. I blew my chance. That's it. Over.
I run upstairs and flop down on my mattress. I cry tears of frustration and hurt. Why can't I tell someone? Why does he have so much control over me?
I'm not going to let him anymore. When he comes home, I won't do what he orders me to do. I won't let him hit me, I'll fight back. My brain wonders into a dream where I'm strong, tough Leah. My muscles will send anyone flying. If Daddy tries to hit me, WHAM.

Suddenly the door slams and I hear Daddy shout up the stairs, "Leah, wheres my food?"
I go down stairs in my own time, my heart thudding with fear.
"Hurry up, you lazy dick".
"Don't call me that", I say trying to sound brave but my voice comes out as a squeak.
"What did you say?" he asks me as if he can't quite believe me. I'm not brave enough to repeat it again so I stand there, trying to hold my head up and hold the tears in.
"You rude little shit! I'll teach you to answer me back!"
He lunges at me and I go to run but he's too quick. He raises his hand and I try to struggle but he's grip is firm. He brings his hand down on me and I scream in pain.
"Shut up", he says and he punches me in the mouth. I feel my lip split and the metallic taste of blood. He doesn't stop though. Next he grabs me by my hair into the kitchen. He lies me on the counter and takes off his belt.
"No Daddy", I scream, "No!"
He has only hit me once before with the belt and that was when I came home really late from school with no good excuse.
He brings it down hard on my back and I scream. He grabs a cloth from the sink and ties it round my mouth to silence me. The cloth might stop the screams but it doesn't stop my tears.
He whips me again and again on my back until it's gone so numb I can't even feel it anymore. Then he shoves me out into the small patch of grass that he calls a garden.
"Stay out there until you can learn some manors!" he yells before shutting the back door and locking it.

 

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