Watching the Ripples Radiate.
Author: marshalg

Chapter 11
Lost Soul

Lost Soul

Sadness comes in waves at night
When thoughts meander back,
To instances of bleak regret
Back there along the track.
You could have done it better
You should have planned it tight,
That wasted opportunity
That chance to make it right.
 
That day you let your Uncle down
The race you should have won,
The flaunted opportunity
When good deeds were not done.
A moments hesitation
Just a fleeting second cost,
In that space of indecision
There’s a million good things lost.
 
That day you lied to mother
And looked into her eyes,
The guilt that twisted up your soul
That weakness you despise.
The hollow empty feeling
When you staggered off to bed
With your thoughts and senses reeling
When you wished that you were dead.
 
Remember when you cheated
In that test you sat last year,
Remember how your guts screwed up
Bright crimson were your ears.
You couldn’t face the teacher
You couldn’t front your mates
You fabricated down time
That a doctor’s note dictates.
 
But worse was when you double dipped
That lovely girl you know.
The one with all the golden curls
Tied up in that cute bow.
You told her that you had to break
That date you promised true,
Instead you skipped out with that tart
Who’s knickers were bright blue.
 
And then you stole the money
From that old ladie’s purse
You know, the cash she’d saved up
To finance her own hearse.
You blew it on the horses
And blamed the jockey’s ride
And cursed and swore and beat the dog
To within an inch of it’s poor hide.
 
And then you sat around and sulked
Did nothing with your time,
You smoked the joint and tried the “P”
And joined the dole queue line.
You bitched and moaned and raved out loud
The Government was to blame
And everyone avoided you
Because you seemed insane.
 
These days you look so thin and gaunt
A shadow of yourself,
Your eyes are dark and haunted
And your youth is on the shelf.
Your clothes are torn and grubby
And your shoes are looking worn,
You wear the badge of hopelessness
You invite people’s scorn. 

How could you do these things my boy,
How could you let us down ?
Why is your heart so miserable ?
Why are you such a clown ?
When are you lifting up your game
To measure up at last ?
Or are you destined to be bad,
A wraith from lost life past ?
 
 
Marshalg
Mangere Bridge
23 January 2008

 

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